Chapter 6

Natalie recalls weekly calls from her mother during her first semester at Harvard, hiding her isolation by pretending college matched her mother’s hopeful vision. On campus, Natalie is repelled by the privileged dorm culture and feels targeted after debating a professor in a large lecture.

Life with her roommate Reena worsens as Natalie endures hostile girls’ nights and Reena’s shifting use of her as a social prop. At a Thursday pregame, a drunk Reena taunts Natalie about faith and loneliness. Natalie snaps, condemns Reena’s dishonesty about an alleged assault and calls her a “whore,” provoking Reena to attack her.

The altercation triggers administrative action, and Natalie is finally moved to a coveted single room—quiet, clean, and her own—ending the unbearable roommate situation. Alone, she buries herself in coursework and late-night internet forums, searching for answers about modern anger, motherhood, and meaning but finding only more confusion.

At semester’s end, a church-group acquaintance confronts Natalie’s deteriorating state; Natalie breaks down and accepts an invitation to rejoin the Christian student group. The community offers fragile relief from loneliness, restoring a sense of survivability.

In early second semester, within that church circle, Natalie meets Caleb, a meeting positioned as consequential for what follows.