Chapter Nineteen

Stuart narrates nine years earlier, consumed by thoughts of Jessamine after their first sexual encounter in late December. Their intimacy is almost exposed when Daisy knocks, forcing Jessamine to hastily cover as Hugo’s claws tap outside the door. Stuart leaves exhilarated, drinks, and returns to his squat.

Back at the squat, Stuart finds a student, Frankie, occupying his futon. On New Year’s Day, Drew, the de facto organizer, asks Stuart to make space for Frankie for a couple of weeks. With no easy alternatives, Stuart worries about where to sleep.

Stuart goes to Jessamine’s house with wine. Jessamine, torn between relief and anger at being “humped and dumped,” confronts the four-day silence since their first liaison. He explains and they drink, then go upstairs and have sex again, Stuart both enthralled and uneasy about their chemistry.

Afterward, they discuss age, singlehood, and loneliness. Stuart admits he likes being single; Jessamine insists a partner is “a completion,” revealing her hunger for attachment. When Stuart probes her habitual drinking, Jessamine deflects, signaling a deeper issue she won’t name.

Hearing her mother and Daisy will be out for hours, Jessamine proposes that Stuart secretly stay the night—and continue to stay hidden in her bed while keeping it from her family. Despite knowing he should refuse, Stuart, displaced from the squat and drawn to comfort and desire, agrees, entrenching a clandestine, precarious arrangement.