Contents
Prologue
Overview
Alicia Berenson starts a diary at Gabriel’s encouragement to manage depression and artistic stagnation. Writing provides relief and serves to reassure him. Alicia expresses overwhelming love for Gabriel yet pointedly avoids darker thoughts, choosing to document only positive, “normal” reflections—signaling repression beneath her cheerful intent.
Summary
Alicia Berenson opens her diary on July 14, uncertain about writing and wary of labels. She frames herself as a visual thinker who rarely uses words, explaining the diary exists because of Gabriel’s concern about her low mood and stalled painting.
Gabriel notices Alicia’s depression and encourages her to keep a written record. After initial resistance, he gifts her a black leather notebook. Alicia begins writing and immediately experiences a sense of release, likening it to therapy.
Alicia admits her deeper motive: to reassure Gabriel and prevent causing him worry or pain. She declares her total love for him, momentarily hinting at an overwhelming, unspoken thought she refuses to write down.
Determined to control the diary’s tone, Alicia resolves it will capture only joyful, creatively inspiring material. She ends by banning “crazy thoughts,” signaling her intention to repress anything darker beneath a positive façade.
Who Appears
- Alicia BerensonPainter and narrator; begins a diary to ease depression, reassure Gabriel, and vows to write only positive thoughts.
- GabrielAlicia’s attentive husband; notices her low mood, encourages writing, and gifts the notebook that starts the diary.