If He Had Been with Me
by Laura Nowlin
Contents
Chapter 59
Overview
Autumn struggles through winter depression as her parents’ divorce becomes public, leaning on Jamie but bristling at his suggestions. Angie and Dave settle into a basement apartment while peers’ relationships unravel ahead of graduation. Autumn spends evenings at Aunt Angelina’s with Finny, noting Sylvie’s gap-year plans and uncertain future with him.
Visits with her father begin sporadically, and by early April, life improves only marginally.
Summary
At school, Angie’s pregnancy is visible and public, and Autumn’s parents’ divorce is now common knowledge. A crude joke from Alex is shut down by the group, and Jamie gently suggests a sun lamp, prompting Autumn to fear he’s tired of supporting her. Jamie reassures her, and Dr. Singh raises Autumn’s medication as winter depression persists and her motivation for writing fades.
Angie and Dave show their new basement apartment, limited by his parents’ rules. Classmates toggle between admiration and contempt, but Angie stays buoyant, often cradling her belly. Socially, Sasha ends things with Alex but they commit to attending prom together. Brooke and Noah reveal they will split after graduation rather than attempt long-distance, highlighting the group’s diverging futures.
Autumn, hating to be alone, spends many evenings at Aunt Angelina’s, where she and Finny quietly do homework. Finny steps away nightly for calls from Sylvie, who plans Europe and a gap year, leaving Autumn unsure if Finny and Sylvie will last. Autumn’s mother lingers there late, further distancing the household.
Autumn meets her father sporadically for dinners in the city. He approves of Jamie and offers a spare bedroom in his river-view apartment, a gesture Autumn doesn’t know how to use. Early April brings green shoots and a slight emotional uptick, but the overall weight of divorce, endings, and uncertainty remains.
Who Appears
- AutumnNarrator; struggles with winter depression and parents’ divorce; medication increased; finds comfort at Aunt Angelina’s and with Jamie.
- JamieBoyfriend; suggests a sun lamp, reassures Autumn of his love, drives her home and remains supportive.
- Angie (Angelina’s daughter)Pregnant and married to Dave; moves into his parents’ basement; openly happy, often touching her belly.
- FinnyChildhood friend; does homework with Autumn; takes nightly calls from Sylvie, signaling uncertain plans.
- Aunt AngelinaHosts frequent dinners; a comfortable refuge for Autumn as her mother stays late there.
- Autumn’s motherSpends most evenings at Angelina’s, leaving Autumn alone at home amid the divorce.
- SylvieFinny’s girlfriend; plans Europe and a gap year; frequent calls highlight her ongoing tie to Finny.
- Preppy DaveAngie’s husband; lives with her in his parents’ basement under strict house rules.
- SashaBreaks up with Alex but agrees to attend prom together; one of the few attending the same college as Jamie.
- AlexMakes an inappropriate joke; gets dumped by Sasha yet remains her prom date.
- BrookeReveals she and Noah will split after graduation rather than attempt long-distance.
- NoahPlans an amicable breakup with Brooke when they go to different colleges.
- Autumn’s fatherMeets Autumn for city dinners; offers a spare bedroom in his apartment.
- Dr. SinghIncreases Autumn’s medication dosage to address seasonal depression.
- Mr. LaugheganTeacher to whom Autumn promised a novel; her lack of progress adds quiet pressure.