If He Had Been with Me
by Laura Nowlin
Contents
Chapter 25
Overview
On Valentine’s Day, Sylvie asks Autumn to deliver a note to a sick Finny, forcing Autumn into a charged encounter that reignites her desire and guilt. Autumn longs to purge her feelings for Finny so she can fully commit to Jamie, who warmly appreciates her heartfelt gifts at dinner.
Summary
On a snowy Valentine’s Day, Autumn wears her snowflake tiara and notes Todd giving roses to Katie, while expecting Jamie’s usual bouquet. At the bus stop, Sylvie unexpectedly asks Autumn whether Finny is coming to school, signaling a crack in their silence.
After school, Sylvie directly hands Autumn a pink envelope to deliver to Finny. Autumn goes to Finny’s house and finds him home sick. He opens the door shirtless and feverish; they exchange brief, awkward words about Sylvie’s note before Autumn leaves, unsettled by her strong attraction and affection for Finny.
Alone, Autumn wrestles with guilt, wishing she could remove her fixation on Finny to fully adore Jamie as he deserves and to free herself from shame. She recognizes that her feelings for Finny undercut her happiness with Jamie.
That evening at a crowded Italian restaurant, Autumn gives Jamie a thoughtful assortment of small gifts. Jamie is pleased and calls her the best girlfriend, reinforcing the stability of their relationship despite Autumn’s hidden turmoil.
Who Appears
- AutumnNarrator; delivers Sylvie’s note to sick Finny, feels intense attraction and guilt, then gives Jamie thoughtful Valentine gifts.
- FinnyHome sick and vulnerable when Autumn visits; his presence reignites Autumn’s conflicted longing.
- JamieAutumn’s boyfriend; brings roses, takes her to dinner, and gratefully receives her personalized gifts.
- SylvieFinny’s ex; breaks silence to ask Autumn to deliver a pink envelope to Finny.
- SashaAutumn’s friend on the bus; provides light commentary about Jamie’s gift.
- Todd the JuniorGives Katie roses at the bus stop, a background Valentine’s moment.
- Katie the New GirlReceives roses from Todd, highlighting school Valentine rituals.