A Parade of Horribles
by Matt Dinniman
Contents
Chapter 25
Overview
While Rosetta and Tipid search Hungry Eyes for a mercenary, Carl and Donut use their short break to open loot boxes in the safe room because Donut's blood bar is still dangerously low. The chapter shows mounting instability around Carl: his corpse-suit class grows more disturbing, the AI's achievements become more unhinged, and Carl gains a major new hotlist contingency ability that could alter future fights. The pause ends violently when drunken Mongo and Rend abandon guard duty, and Mordecai reacts to Rend with a prophetic threat that is immediately followed by Rend's death.
Summary
Carl and Donut send Rosetta and Tipid into Hungry Eyes to look for a surviving mercenary, then hurry back to the safe room to open loot boxes before the next heat. Donut's blood bar has barely recovered, so they need useful items quickly. Inside, the room has been cleaned out, the remaining group is killing time with Mario Kart, and Samantha is effortlessly winning while NPCs and sluggalos cheer her on.
As Carl tries to eat from his ruined food box, he continues dealing with the disturbing effects of the kangaroo corpse suit. His Fursona skill keeps leveling on its own, making the suit feel more like his real body, and it unlocks a new feature Carl does not want to understand. Donut opens her boxes and complains that most of the rewards are bad, including more gremlin scrolls and a humiliating last-place achievement.
Imani stays near Carl and Donut because she wants to avoid Linus, but the conversation shifts when Donut asks about Imani's brothers. Imani answers briefly, then cuts the exchange short by turning her attention to the Mario Kart game instead. Carl realizes Imani does not want to dwell on her family history and reassures Donut privately that the question itself was not malicious.
Carl then opens his own boxes and gets a string of unsettling achievements tied to the corpse suit, the kangaroo pouch, and his awkward contact with the boss during the race. Most of the rewards are useless or humiliating, including a literal fast-food job application, but his Platinum Boss Box gives him a valuable potion that expands his hotlist and unlocks contingency settings. Carl immediately recognizes the new automation system as powerful and potentially fight-changing.
The mood breaks when Mongo and Rend, still drunk, stumble in from the garage instead of guarding Hedy, and Jamal fails to stop them. Mordecai enters carrying empty potion balls and starts to ask Carl for help, but he freezes when he sees Rend. Mordecai rises into the air, speaks a dire warning about Rend's death and the beginning of the end, and Rend drops dead on the spot. The chapter closes with Carl receiving the system notice that his pet has died.
Who Appears
- CarlOpens loot boxes in the safe room, endures worsening corpse-suit effects, and gains the hotlist contingency skill.
- DonutNeeds her blood bar restored, grumbles through poor loot rewards, and awkwardly presses Imani about family.
- ImaniAvoids talking about her past, encourages Carl to open boxes, and joins the Mario Kart game.
- SamanthaDominates Mario Kart with a Wii controller in her mouth and jokingly threatens the other players.
- MordecaiArrives with potion balls, sees Rend, delivers an ominous warning, and triggers the chapter's deadly turn.
- RendReturns drunk from the garage instead of guarding and dies immediately after Mordecai confronts him.
- MongoStaggers into the safe room drunk, abandoning guard duty despite Donut and Jamal's protests.
- JamalActs as an extra guard in the garage and tries unsuccessfully to keep Mongo and Rend in place.
- RosettaSent into Hungry Eyes with Tipid to find any mercenary still alive.
- TipidGoes with Rosetta to recruit a mercenary after earlier sorting through suspicious documents.