Cover of A Parade of Horribles

A Parade of Horribles

by Matt Dinniman


Genre
Fantasy, Science Fiction, Horror, Humor and Comedy
Year
2026
Pages
705
Contents

Chapter 31

Overview

A grateful note from Luca Di reframes Donut's past actions as life-changing acts of mercy, urging her to forgive herself for terrible choices made in the dungeon. When the race resumes, Carl's team uses careful preparation to deploy ghoul gunners and sabotage Team Sparkles, briefly gaining ground. But the real threat becomes the migrating Sugar Hermits, forcing Donut and the ghouls to reveal powerful defensive tactics just to keep the truck from being swallowed.

Summary

The chapter opens with an entry from Luca Di in Donut's book. Luca explains that Carl and Donut once saved both him and his mother, Giulia DiMarco, who had dementia before taking a race that restored her mind. Because of that, Luca was able to speak honestly with her, find forgiveness, and make peace before she later died on the bubble level. Luca also tells Donut that it is acceptable to forgive herself for the damage caused by the War Crime spell, because sometimes there are no good choices.

The scene then returns to the race as the light turns green and Gluteus launches the truck forward at extreme speed. Carl braces himself in the bucking vehicle while Donut panics at Gluteus's reckless driving and Dorota uselessly offers comfort. Loud music starts playing as Carl moves to the back and deploys the improvised pulley system that Hedy designed, swinging both ghoul cages out over the sides of the truck so the ghouls can act as mobile gunners.

With the truck still under temporary invulnerability, Carl checks the field and learns from Donut that Team Sparkles is ahead using a rocket-powered tumbleweed. To slow the leaders and other rivals, Carl fires his Denial of Service missiles. The missiles aimed at Team Sparkles hit their shield and coat it in thick slime, blinding and disabling them rather than destroying them outright. This lets Carl's team overtake them, but the advantage is brief because the truck's invulnerability is about to end.

As soon as the protection drops, Donut discovers that her shield will not cover the two ghouls hanging outside the truck. At that moment, enormous waves of migrating Sugar Hermits surge in from both sides of the road, threatening to bury the racers. Carl sticks to the plan, raises one ghoul toward the roof to help with forward threats, and orders the other to throw Biscuit Pack potion bombs. The bombs explode into fast-hardening foam that traps clusters of skulls and creates barriers, slowing the swarm enough to keep the truck moving.

The team passes the slime-blinded Sparkles, but the road ahead fills with more Sugar Hermits, narrowing their safe path and eroding their lead. To stop the tide from closing in, Donut casts an upgraded Wall of Fire alongside the truck. The spell erupts into a towering, mile-long line of flames, giving the team a powerful new defense as the race enters an even more dangerous phase.

Who Appears

  • Carl
    Coordinates the truck's defenses, deploys the ghoul cages, and fires sabotage missiles at rival teams.
  • Princess Donut
    Receives Luca's emotional praise, warns about Gluteus's driving, and casts shield and a massive Wall of Fire.
  • Gluteus Maxx
    Drives the truck at dangerous speed, helping launch the team into the heat's opening chaos.
  • Luca Di
    Writes to Donut about finding forgiveness with his mother after Carl and Donut saved them.
  • Dr. Metcalf
    Monitors the timing of the truck's invulnerability as the race begins.
  • Dorota
    Offers Donut comfort during the violent start of the race, mostly adding comic interruption.
  • Giulia DiMarco
    Luca's mother, whose restored mind let Luca reconcile with her before her death.
  • Team Sparkles
    Early front-runners whose shield is coated in slime by Carl's Denial of Service missiles.
  • The ghouls
    Ride in side cages and throw potion bombs to keep the Sugar Hermit waves from overwhelming the truck.
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