Cover of A Parade of Horribles

A Parade of Horribles

by Matt Dinniman


Genre
Fantasy, Science Fiction, Horror, Humor and Comedy
Year
2026
Pages
705
Contents

Chapter 58

Overview

After the bar fight, Carl postpones Jurgen’s desperate pleas about the threatened children and Heidi so he can use his newly won guild access. Inside the Stage Performance Guild, Carl finds and helps Porky, Corky’s missing other half, who reveals that the Lady Dominators are magically draining Corky before races. Porky agrees to help Carl rescue and reunite with Corky before the next heat, creating a concrete plan and a new ally at a critical moment.

Summary

In the immediate aftermath of the bar riot, the bartender carries away what remains of the DJ while the others scramble to recover the nickels from Dong Quixote’s damaged sock. Carl tries to stabilize the situation before they get thrown out. He sends Tipid and Bucket Boy to drag the unconscious unicorn back to the garage, asks Imani to watch Dong so he does not ruin anything, and notes Donut’s sulking mood as the bar slowly settles.

Before Carl can enter the hidden Stage Performance Guild, Jurgen stops him in a panic about the goddess threatening the children. Carl argues that their best chance is still to push Lucia Mar into taking a deal and leaving the board. Jurgen begs to be sent out through the Pineapple Cabaret route, but Carl says Akuma warned that worshippers of gods cannot go there. When Carl learns Jurgen worships Donar and has lightning spells, he also hears a more personal fear: Jurgen has lost contact with Heidi, believes she is in danger, and says she is pregnant. Carl can only promise he is doing what he can and urges Jurgen to survive the next race.

Inside the guild, Carl finds the space is a dusty, abandoned theater and discovers Porky, Corky’s other half, lying helpless onstage in a white body-containment gimp suit with a zipper stuck in his flesh. Carl frees the zipper, and Porky rewards him with free levels in Carl’s Razzmatazz skill. Carl then explains that Corky vanished while searching for Porky, has reappeared as part of the Lady Dominators, and now spends every race unconscious in their vehicle.

Porky explains what is happening to Corky. Female mantaurs follow Enyo rather than Grull and use domination and submission magic to drain Corky before races, boosting themselves while leaving him completely submissive and unconscious. Porky says his own devotion to Grull vanished when he was split, reveals that if Corky dies he will die as well, and immediately agrees to help. Carl proposes getting Porky out of the guild, breaking Corky free before the next race, and performing the reunification ceremony within two hours. Porky accepts and adds one more goal: he wants help finding and beating Dong Quixote, whom he blames for causing all of this.

Who Appears

  • Carl
    stabilizes the riot aftermath, enters the guild, and recruits Porky to save Corky
  • Porky
    Corky’s separated half; guildmaster who explains the Lady Dominators’ magic and agrees to help
  • Jurgen
    panicked ally who fears for the children, Heidi, and their unborn baby
  • Corky
    absent mantaur being drained into submission by the Lady Dominators before races
  • Dong Quixote
    chaotic stripper Carl distrusts; Porky blames him for the disaster
  • Donut
    sits sullenly after the riot while Carl handles the fallout
  • Imani
    agrees to watch Dong so he does not interfere with Carl’s plans
  • Tipid
    runs to assist and helps haul the unconscious unicorn away
  • Bucket Boy
    helps Tipid move the unconscious unicorn back toward the garage
  • Prepotente
    continues raiding the bar during the cleanup after the fight
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